Blue Damage

10/12/05

Why Blogs Suck

Filed under: — Recipher @ 5:02 pm

Even thought the “Controversial Subject Sucks” trifecta was completed a while back on Blue Damage, a lot of things still suck and are worth bitching about. So, look forward to more and more “this sucks” and “that sucks” articles in the near future. Today, we will tackle one of the more important sucks posts. Face it, blogs suck and are a dying phenomenon. There are many reasons why blogs suck, but, we only have time to highlight the most important of them. We have a shuffleboard tournament for the staff of Blue Damage in a half an hour, so, this will be brief.

First off, installing blogs on the internets is hards! The staff here at Blue Damage has been internetting for a while now, and, installing blogs is one of the hardest projects we ever spearheaded besides installing AOLs on our computers. It took us an entire year and a half to just to get this blog up. But, it’s supposed to be easy right? Time elements aside, we still aren’t certain why we had to sacrifice the 1 month old kitten to populate the database. It just doesn’t make sense.

more…

10/6/05

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man Back in Demand!

Filed under: — Recipher @ 12:53 am

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube MenDue to unforeseen demand for the product, Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube men are once again out of stock all across the world. Prices are rising up faster than Tom Delay’s and Bill Frist’s blood pressure combined.

We spoke with Terry Webb about the recent changes in demand and the reasons for it. “Well, the demand has skyrocketed in the last few months! Over 40% of Americans are going crazy for this things… just like the Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Men! How can you resist!? Some are saying the demand has increased so much because of a photo shoot of naked and shaved Mark Linn-Baker inspecting inflatable arms that were flailing all over the place!” Jerry told us while wackily waving his hands.

more…

10/2/05

My Internets are…

Filed under: — Recipher @ 10:33 pm

Why googling for the phrase “my internets are”, you will find such gems as…

  • My Internets are fastel than yours.
  • My Internets are being starved of their my internet supply.
  • My Internets are safe. (This was “varified”)
  • My Internets are the down.
  • My Internets are telling me conflicting stories.
  • My Internets are very powerful, and thou shall find thyself tumbling and screaming in a raging whirlwind of cleverly crafted and origional insults.
  • My Internets are consistent now.
  • My Internets are leaving for a week or two.
  • My Internets are particularly flakey today.
  • My Internets are telling me that they are read only. What do I do? (nice)
  • My Internets are going to be raped.

What are your internets up to?