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	<title>Blue Damage &#187; Political Distortion</title>
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	<description>The most important and sarcastic information on the interweb.</description>
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		<title>Disillusioned Voter Turns to Zoltar Fortune Teller for Answers</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/25/disillusioned-voters-turn-to-zoltan-fortune-teller/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/25/disillusioned-voters-turn-to-zoltan-fortune-teller/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 25 Jan 2008 21:29:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cultural Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/25/disillusioned-voters-turn-to-zoltan-fortune-teller/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ Ever wonder why the system only produces horrible, unaccountable candidates for president?  Many of us are aware of the lesser of two evils principle: the idea that of two bad choices, one isn&#8217;t as bad as the other, and should be chosen over the one that is a greater threat. A confused twenty-something [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/25/disillusioned-voters-turn-to-zoltan-fortune-teller/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Rudy Giuliani&#8217;s name misspelled on Florida Sample Ballot</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/12/rudi-giuliani/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/12/rudi-giuliani/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 12 Jan 2008 18:51:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/12/rudi-giuliani/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Shouldn&#8217;t things like this be proofread? Well, at least the sample ballots still have a paper trail. 
*puts on tin foil hat*
]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2008/01/12/rudi-giuliani/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Disregard the Candle Party Invitation, Government Mind Control</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/14/government-using-toxins-from-candles-for-mind-control/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/14/government-using-toxins-from-candles-for-mind-control/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Oct 2007 03:50:24 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scientific Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/14/government-using-toxins-from-candles-for-mind-control/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ 
&#8220;The tragedy of the whole thing is that candles are so beautiful,&#8221; Chemist Benjamin Jones exhaustedly affirmed. Jones was dressed in a Batman costume, however, for the sake of truthful journalism, we decided to hear him out. &#8220;Certain types of candles emit toxic chemicals that nearly train the mind to become malleable. The high [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/14/government-using-toxins-from-candles-for-mind-control/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>10</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>CIA Goes Web 2.0</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/12/cia-goes-web-20/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/12/cia-goes-web-20/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 12 Oct 2007 05:22:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/12/cia-goes-web-20/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The internet has a lot of information on it&#8230; well, that&#8217;s an understatement. It is estimated to have over 1,000 floppy disks worth of data just throughout America alone. How would a CIA agent go through all that information to find potential threats, leads on important cases and squash out conspiracy theories that might have [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/10/12/cia-goes-web-20/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Capital of India Becomes First Corporately Sponsored City</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/09/14/capital-of-india-becomes-first-corporately-sponsored-city/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/09/14/capital-of-india-becomes-first-corporately-sponsored-city/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Sep 2007 15:43:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>dgreen</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cultural Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Technology]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/09/14/capital-of-india-becomes-first-corporately-sponsored-city/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[New Delhi (AP) &#8211; Computer super power Dell has taken corporate sponsorship to the next level. Following in the proud tradition of the Coors Brewing Company, America West Airlines and RCA, Dell has decided to sponsor something on a much larger scale &#8211; a nation&#8217;s capital.
Pioneering the concept of putting your companies name on an [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/09/14/capital-of-india-becomes-first-corporately-sponsored-city/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Dick Cheney Tells National Archives He&#8217;s a Robot</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/06/22/dick-cheney-the-robot/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/06/22/dick-cheney-the-robot/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 22 Jun 2007 12:42:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scientific Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/06/22/dick-cheney-the-robot/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ Well, Dick Cheney is at it again, with his wacky dance moves and delicious homemade cannoli rolls. However, the latest with the Vice President unfortunately doesn&#8217;t involve wacky dancing or cannoli rolls. Cheney, in order to greasily slip his way out of providing classified information for the National Archives, told them that he a [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2007/06/22/dick-cheney-the-robot/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Faulty Voting Machines Wonder What&#8217;s the Point?</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/11/06/faulty-voting-machines/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/11/06/faulty-voting-machines/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Nov 2006 00:08:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Max Power</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Short Stories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Technology]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/11/06/faulty-voting-machines/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Ok, I&#8217;ll admit,&#8221; Secret Galactic Overlord Zurbox claimed, &#8220;Using recovered alien technology reverse engineered into voting machines doesn&#8217;t seem like such a good idea anymore.&#8221;  It pulled up his gamma-trousers, adjusted its omni-cod-piece, and continued.
&#8220;It all started as a search for a cost efficient alternative to mind control.  Brain washing the masses is [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/11/06/faulty-voting-machines/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>10</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Read the Bills Act of 2006</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/22/read-the-bills-act-of-2006/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/22/read-the-bills-act-of-2006/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 22 Oct 2006 09:21:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/22/read-the-bills-act-of-2006/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ Accountability is the Republican theme for the upcoming election next month. Congress recently passed the The Read the Bills Act of 2006, which will finally force our elected officials to read the laws that they have been passing. Without reading. Yes, it came as a shock to us as well that the government has [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/22/read-the-bills-act-of-2006/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>8</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Republican Mark Foley blames Scandal on Clinton, Liberal Corruption</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/04/mark-foley-blames-clinton/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/04/mark-foley-blames-clinton/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 05 Oct 2006 02:15:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/04/mark-foley-blames-clinton/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[While it is surprising to see Mark Foley without his &#8220;child shield&#8221; in an interview, we were able to catch up with him and discuss the recent allegations and a few predictions from the Blue Damage team. One on one, via AIM. If you are wondering what a &#8220;child shield&#8221; is, it is in reference [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/10/04/mark-foley-blames-clinton/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>George Bush Vetoes Stem Cell Research Bill, Collects Embryos for Project</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/08/09/george-bushs-embryonic-army/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/08/09/george-bushs-embryonic-army/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 09 Aug 2006 22:19:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Cultural Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scientific Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/08/09/george-bushs-stem-cell-army/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[ It would come without a shock that the first and only bill that George Bush would veto would have to do with Stem Cell research. Of course, this isn&#8217;t news as all as it happened nearly a month ago. However, there are new developments in the story that Blue Damage was able to uncover. [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/08/09/george-bushs-embryonic-army/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>7</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Cindy Sheehan the Movie: Cindy and the Dragon</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/04/20/cindy-sheehan-the-movie/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/04/20/cindy-sheehan-the-movie/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 21 Apr 2006 04:44:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Max Power</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Short Stories]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/04/20/cindy-sheehan-the-movie/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When something or someone upsets me I tend to release my angry blood by writing a scathing satire. I unleash a lampoon so pretentious, so crass and so inane that no one in their right mind will understand or appreciate it. The following will be no exception.
But it could have been, oh sweet, slim and [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/04/20/cindy-sheehan-the-movie/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>13</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The 6th Pillar of Islam</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/23/the-6th-pillar-of-islam/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/23/the-6th-pillar-of-islam/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 23 Feb 2006 19:26:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Max Power</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Randomization]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/23/the-6th-pillar-of-islam/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[At our noon meeting, the editor here at Blue Damage, my boss, pulled me aside to his office. &#8220;Great!&#8221; I thought, &#8220;How many times do I have to suck this guy off before I get my wife&#8217;s severed foot back?&#8221; But it had absolutely nothing to do with that, it was about an interview for [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/23/the-6th-pillar-of-islam/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>7</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>George W. Bush Creates New Katrina Scapegoat, Elfkins</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/10/bureaucratic-elfkins/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/10/bureaucratic-elfkins/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 10 Feb 2006 21:40:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Recipher</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/10/bureaucratic-elfkins/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It is safe to say that George Bush is going to have another bad year. Not only has his prostate swollen up like a grapefruit recently, but, today the former FEMA chief Michael Brown testified before a Senate committee. Michael spoke about how the government was very slow to act and he shouldn&#8217;t have been [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/02/10/bureaucratic-elfkins/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>6</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>National Security Failures are by Design or, Homeland Insecurity</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/30/national-security-failures-are-by-design/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/30/national-security-failures-are-by-design/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jan 2006 02:18:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Max Power</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Distortion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/30/national-security-failures-are-by-design/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The recent appalling failures in national security outlined by the 9/11 Commission’s report were found not to be due to obvious Executive, Legislative, and Judicial impotence. Rather on purpose, in an asinine attempt to stem the ever escalating violence.
Michael Chertoff comments to the media while throwing rocks from atop his heavily fortified, bullet proof glass [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/30/national-security-failures-are-by-design/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>9</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Teen Suicide Helps our Proud Nation</title>
		<link>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/20/teen-suicide-works/</link>
		<comments>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/20/teen-suicide-works/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 20 Jan 2006 20:33:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Max Power</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Political Distortion]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.bluedamage.com/2005/09/04/teen-suicide-works/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[After being continuously baffled by the growing threat of Al Queda and the war in Iraq, United States Anti-terrorism and Defense leaders developed a new, long-term, plan to set apart the destruction of the Arab cultures as we now know them. The idea surfaced after numerous soldiers reported Bon Jovi and Pat Benatar music blaring, [...]]]></description>
		<wfw:commentRss>http://www.bluedamage.com/2006/01/20/teen-suicide-works/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>8</slash:comments>
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