New Firefox Extension Makes The Mundane Thrilling, Sexy
“I closed that tab about halfway into the second paragraph,” shouts Tray Barton, self proclaimed internet ADD sufferer. “I mean, all of the information on the internet excites me to the point of climax, but… I can never get through an article without spacing out and navigating away from the page to find more demotivational posters.”
Tray, like most internetters, has the attention span of a 6 year old on microdots. Not that anyone here on our staff has any experience with secretly feeding 6 year olds that sort of thing laced in Halloween candy in 2005. But all of that is about to change with a new, innovative Firefox extension. The programmer, Charlie Woods, expounded upon the new extension which is due to be released early next year. Now with moar screenshots!
I am pleased to announce Blue Damage has received a shiny, coveted gadget symbolizing a higher status in the tech community. Yes, it’s an advanced copy of the Apple iPhone. I was able to get my muculent mitts around this cellular device several months in advance. A Mac employee wanting to remain anonymous is a friend of the family. Don’t worry though; it won’t affect our bias at all. In fact, we think the iPhone sucks. Hard. These reasons should give you the right to smack anyone in the face calling the iPhone revolutionary, the end all of mobile computing or the greatest thing since Full House. We liked Full House a lot, especially Dave Coulier. Saying that is almost disrespectful. On to the review, here are a few reasons why the Apple iPhone sucks the proverbial big one.
Steve Ballmer hinted today that Vista might be delayed EVEN MORE. Everyone in the IT industry and their mother has been talking about Microsoft pushing the release date back on Vista for nearly a year now. But what exactly are the reasons for this delay, besides Bill Gates obsession with quality? Microsoft has promised so many features that won’t even be included in this release, so, what are we waiting for? We consulted with an industry expert (in the shoe industry but, whatever) about why Microsoft is metaphorically blue balled.